Year’s End

We approach the year’s end
as uncelebrating
as every brown leaf
that blows along the ground,
as every squirrel that scuffles
among the leaves,
as every insect sleeping in its dried up stalk,
as all the crows that have gone home by now

It’s just one day into the next,
the rain, the fog, the winter light,
the stillness of the evening,
the morning’s breath

In other times, in other energies,
we made a mark here,
found some significance,
some grand design for change,
but this time round we’re flying low,
conserving strength,
hugging the curve of darkness
till the light returns.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 31, 2019

Sorrow

Sorrow has its season,
not as master, but as shadow,
a reminder of emptiness
and the song that fills it

Sorrow brings us
down through the wet passage
of echoes, dark shiny walls
and the sound of dripping

We will know how deep we are
as sorrow plumbs us.
We’ll come out richer
on the other side.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 30, 2019

Actually

For a moment I forgot
that joy is unconditional —
I looked around, and saw,
then felt, the sadness
everywhere it lay along
the tragic and the casual
occurrences of unfulfilled conditions

The sighs arising
slip like wisps above them,
hover haunted, sink on down —
it’s easy to believe
no answer can be found for anyone

But joy is unconditional —
it cracks like a smile,
bounds up like a bubble,
flows, light filled,
through all the places
where things seemed so sad.
This is not a big problem, actually —
it’s just time to claim our heritage.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 29, 2019

Your Spark

(from the biking philosopher’s notebook)

You don’t own your spark
but you owe it —
owe it your attention,
your time, your thought, your care

You can’t use your spark to serve you —
you serve it —
give it everything you are,
all you can do

And in return
it will mature,
become a flame, become a light,
you will be nourished in its service,
even known by it —
it will make you what you are
and guide your every step
and as you tend it daily,
it will be your life.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 28, 2019

Low Points

It isn’t bad
to have to cry
in spite of how
the sun has spun
the grass heads into gold
and wind has gently ruffled ducks
and all in all
it was a fine day

These low points
come in sometimes
like nomad clouds
that mass and gather
and move through —

They will go as silently
as they came. Either today
or tomorrow — whether
bringing rain or not.
Either the sun will melt them
or bright laughter
will chase them off.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 27, 2019

Good Night

At the delicious edge of sleep —
the doors of dream enticingly ajar
(or maybe they are more like pools
or limbs exploring towards infinity)

From that alluring edge
I’m reeled back in —
your voice, or at another time
your finger tapping —
engendering my dull reluctant rise
through layers swiftly shredding
back to here

And so my softest thing to do
is laugh —
it shimmers with releasing ripples,
keeps my thought from coalescing solid,
allows my sleepy drift
back toward the edge …

©Wendy Mulhern
December 26, 2019

Attention

Now that my hope is fully uncoupled
from the day’s outcomes,
now that it holds itself
in its own light,
I can see shoots sprouting
where before, perhaps,
the weight of my wishes
would have smothered them

I have no wishes,
only conviction
that every living thing
forms in this sacred space
of weightless hope,
nurtured to fruition
by the attention,
in wave form contiguity,
to every breath.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 25, 2019

What we wanted

All we ever wanted
was to be reunited
with our source,
to be in that communion
like water is
as it travels on its journeys
to be reunited with itself,
as it carries light in liquid ripples
through rills and streams

All we wanted
was that certainty
of what we are —
that we are good,
that we are one
with that which lights us up within

We may pursue our winding path
through darkness,
but it’s the gleams of light that lift us
and our light reflecting essence
that guides us
(as we will see when we look)
to everything we wanted.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 24, 2019

Altar

I lay the broken pieces on the altar
that they might be knit together by light,
that it might bathe them and envelope them
and be all the space between them
till no space is left unfilled
and they will be full,
and their former gaps will now be
the most precious of their substance,
and their former shards
will be cherished reminders
of what I hoped for long ago,
and that, in the light,
nothing is lost.

©Wendy Mulhern
December 23, 2019