Portal Vision

I went through the portal
And now everything is different
Or maybe nothing has changed at all.

*
I see the vision
in the corner of my mind
And I can only approach it
if I treat it like a wild deer —
Don’t look straight at it,
Don’t move too fast,
Pretend to browse for food,
Go forward slowly, sideways,
Not with my attacking feet or teeth
but leading with my vulnerable side. 

It isn’t a wild deer —
It won’t bolt.
But there’s something about the focus
That won’t hold if I look straight at it.
It wants to come around me softly
And warm me from behind like sunshine —
Strong heat on the back of my ear, my shoulder
Melting my resistance.
It wants to glow behind me
And light up my path ahead,
Make a long shadow of me
to send before me like a scout.
It wants me to have this light
But always know
It doesn’t come from me.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 28, 2013


A Place of Need

How convenient it is
for me to croon about
holding angel presence
and moving out beyond a place of need
to a place where I can stand and give and heal!

How cherry-picked the role
of one whose challenges
have all been overcome,
who then can share her wisdom
to the good of all the world!

How bogus to imagine
I could somehow cease to need,
when Life has set us 
in this web of caring,
where every strand 
is tied up with the others,
so that we breathe and rise and fall together.

And I, I’ve fallen prey
to this same trap before
and laughed about it afterwards,
as if that time I’d finally
outgrown the childish tendency
and wouldn’t be so foolish anymore.

Ah! Have mercy! 
Please forgive me, be my friend —
Hold me up precisely when I’m laughable,
Keep your vision of me
based on what your wisdom holds,
Now and when I tumble here again.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 27, 2013


Moments

I find myself collecting these family times
like sunshine,
basking in the glow of evening lamps
and in the mingling sounds
music on the radio,
dinner preparation,
the squeaking rocking chair,
and snippets from a laptop —
Drawing warmth from our collective presence.

Knowing it’s as rare
as sun is in Seattle.
calling me to cherish it the same,
Entrancing with the shimmer
of that which is ephemeral,
Gone almost before it can be named.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 25, 2013


White Noise

The page wasn’t blank from nothingness
But, like white light, white noise,
It was blank from all the disparate pursuits
that sent their separate threads across my mind,
Each tugging in a different direction:

The thread of memories and learnings
from recent days,
The thread of long exertion
sweeping needles off the roof
The thread of hopes and plans
for the not-too-distant future,
And needed tasks to make tomorrow
roll in smooth

Which all resulted
in a cancellation of the crossing waves
And the illusion of an emptiness
that really was a fullness
(and, perhaps, a need for sleep)
that kept my cogent thoughts from forming here.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 24, 2013


Messages

“What you seek is seeking you,”
And, across the open space,
is calling;
Strong magnetic signals
align your ions,
drawing you towards each other.

What you trust
can come with you.
That which has loved you
will always love you,
And in that love,
has earned the right to stay
steady in your heart,
To stand by you, and too,
to be supported.
What you’re seeking 
will not require you to be split,
or lost, or make uncaring choices;
It will augment in you 
an ever greater love.

That which waits along the side
and craves to bless
will find its blessing,
and in that blessing,
soothe and be renewed,
ignite its purpose in the good it does to others
For as it deeply gives,
it feels its value proved.
And in the work of love
each call for help is heeded
No one will be left out in the cold,
for everyone is needed.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 23, 2013


Decisions

In the shifty space
between the invitation
and the leap,
where possibilities, like magnets,
jostle with invisible forces,
jockeying to make the most appropriate alliances,
we wait.

At some point the field will clear,
the dance of alternate attractions
find resolve,
or not,
and we will stand or dive or tumble
into the decision,
carried on swiftly
in the river of time.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 22, 2013


Breathing

I am entranced
by my breathing.
It is like the surf
that flows in as a wave
but whose return,
steady but delayed,
entails a seething seeping,
down and in,
permeating, lubricating,
bringing life.
It is like the boughs of cedar
in the wind —
how they give and give
in gracious bend
and then return,
a calm reception and unspringing
of the wind’s impulse.
There’s nothing mechanical
about this body.
Its breathing makes it one
with the one sweeping flow
called life,
that owns everything —
galaxies and microcosms,
sands, skies, seas,
forests and rivers and plains,
and you and me.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 21, 2013


Open

I held myself open

and the currents coursed in and in
on waves of sound;
I let myself be incomplete
so Spirit could decide,
could take me,
use me in fulfilling its own ends.

I held myself open
and the uncompleted loop invited flow,
caught me up
within a larger motion,
beyond my thought of where I was to go.

This kind of attention —
How to follow
the impulse of the slightest nuance,
to feel the current so created
as a palpable connection —
Engendered unexpected exaltation.

There’s time to be open
And afterwards, time to close
in the grateful rest that plays back
the full glorious song of it,
Remembering it, integrating it,
Becoming whole.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 20, 2013


Basking

Sun shines clarity
through every vision.
Painted interplay of light
along the walls
brings out relationships
unseen in shade.
Earth warmth makes spirits rise
like air
in soft molecular expansion,
a floating in of possibilities
unconsidered hitherto.
It is enough to be here
basking in the magic
of the moment
while potent promises join hands
in co-creation of the gracious day.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 19, 2013


Wake up

Wake up, wake up,
This is not your life —
It’s just that old dream,
The one that loops and loops
and never finds its resolution

Wake up, notice the signs
that this is just a dream:
The way you never get what you desire
The way it seems your only choice
is to feel empty
or fill the void with things you’re loath to do

Wake up — there’s more —
Your life is made
of stunning bands of chords and light
You’re vast as all those distant burning stars
Release this tiresome dream
and fill your sight
with what they tell your heart
of who you are.

©Wendy Mulhern
February 18, 2013